Once upon a time, there was a big red fat man who roamed the sideline bleeding green. That fat man resigned and recommended to teach Philly how to Dougie. Howie traded up to give his new coach a QB. Wentz was playing at an MVP level, but then he got hurt. Evil totem pole worshipper Foles rose up and led the Eagles to their first championship. Something the rest of us won’t hear the end of for at least twenty years. Wentz was traded, Doug was fired, a lot of the blame would fall on n Howie, but he remains. Philly traded one of their THREE first rounders for AJ Brown. He’s gonna like Jalen. Wentz was shipped to Indy, where he played on a bad foot and two sprained ankles with Covid. How dare he not be perfect! Irsay treated Wentz like he stole his percs and dealt him to us. Wentz is on his last legs, this is how he will respond…..
Week one of the regular season is a bit of a revenge game for Wentz, or will it be his undoing. Make no mistake, Wentz needs to have a big game in this one because this is the team that got him shipped out. Doug is a solid HC, and I expect him to have Jacksonville competitive this year. Lawrence and Wentz will face off, but I think ultimately we win this game by a score of 27-14. Wentz has to at least duplicate his performance of last year for us to even stand a chance at 9-8.
Week two is for Detroit. When you look at this on paper, these two look like give seats. They aren’t. The Lions have played hard for Dan. He may not have good sound bites but he’s got this bunch bought in. They’ve made some additions but a rematch of the top two picks in their draft will go to Wentz in a closer 23-17 game. I expect Terry to play his butt off in both of these games getting off to hot start.
Week three isn’t a big game, it’s a huge game for Carson. The Eagles swept us last year, we have to hope to split the difference with our division rivals to avoid finishing last. I suspect this game will be close with the defense locking down the run. We finish with a 33-17 victory in a blowout. Hurts turns the ball over forcing the ball to Brown in a desperation rally and we cruise to 3-0.
Weeks four and five will be losses. The Titans rotated players off the street and still finished with the top seed. Don’t expect a fall off without Brown. This offense runs thru He Ty. He will wear this defense down as Wentz will have a rough day. Dallas will roast our secondary causing us to abandon the run game and we will be handled pretty easily. The trend will be when our defense faces good QBs we will be exposed.
If there is ever a good time to have a Thursday night game on a two game losing streak, it’s to have a two game losing streak Thursday night game against the Bears. Justin will wish he had been drafted to a different team at sometime this year. We roll the Bears 35-20. We are now 4-2 heading into a show down at home with the Pack.
Shoot outs were known in the Wild West, well this one will be a shootout as our coverage gets smoked. Carson leads Washington to a stunning last second TD and we hear Kirk screaming you like that? Oh wait, speaking of Kirk he is reunited with Collins or were they ever a thing? Collins was beat out by Ron for this job. Kirk has some great WRs, and we aren’t good in coverage. Carson will try to overcompensate and we will fall in a blowout. Hey Kirk, you like that? But before Kirk gets his revenge, Carson will get his revenge over Ryan, the "upgrade" the Colts made at QB. Our DL will feast on the statue of Matt Ryan and over time, that statue will crumble. Going back into divisional games, we are sitting on top of the division at 6-3.
Everybody loves Monday right? Well, at least Monday night football…except Wentz. Philly will be ready this time. Hurts and Brown develop some chemistry and Philly sends us tumbling out of first place. It will be close, but Wentz can’t convert a late fourth down. Fans begin to get nervous, until they look at next week’s opponent. Mills isn’t bad, and he is sneaky. Texans shock the Commanders and everyone goes crazy calling for Danny to sell the team, Jack, Ron, Wentz, Terry, and Sweat to be publicly executed, Chase will be deemed the biggest bust in the history of the franchise despite no trade up. People will call for Howell to start and to lose out. It’s only 6-5. Soon to be 7-5 as Marcus plays well next year letting Ridder sit. Wentz will conjure up some heroics and fans will ask for a stay of everyone’s execution. Weeks 13 and 15, things get real. The Giants won’t be push overs, it’s a coin flip…but I think we sweep. Sitting at 9-5 things are looking great right? Nope.
The three games will be our undoing and many will question if Wentz has that clutch gene needed. The Browns will be in the playoff hunt and by the time we play them, Watson or Baker will have established chemistry. The Niners would be our best hope with Trey, but if he’s good, this team is a super bowl contender. Their defense sends Wentz to the bench with the beating he takes. Taylor throws a twenty yard pass and it’s picked. Let the blow out commence. Dallas has all but locked up the division crown, but Jerry doesn’t sit his players to spoil our playoff hopes. The broom comes out and we miss the playoffs at 9-8. Wentz throws for 4100 yardsish….29 TDs/11 picks/6 fumbles/ and five pimples growing out of his left nostril that explodes on defensive linemen who don’t have a face shield on their helmet. The end.