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Maybe it's because I am writing this from the grounds of Disney World in Orlando, Florida, but I have to tell you guys, I am feeling none the worse for wear after the opening salvo this past weekend. Sure, I have had to keep a bag of frozen peas on my downstairs urrrrrrrea pretty much since the Niles Paul fumble, but it just feels right, you know? I don't even know how to be a Redskins fan anymore without the sting of a million tiny fists pounding my loins.
It just feels...magical. Okay, the Long Island Iced Teas have not had any negative effects either. I guess I am just not ready to officially close the book on the 2014 Washington Redskins season just quite yet. Call me crazy.
The best way to make it to the playoffs is to win your division. I'll let James or Bernhard use regression analysis to prove my point, but in short:
- The New York Giants might be worse this year than they were last year. Eli Manning looks like his own kid brother. Tom Coughlin continues to reinvent the "We talked about this all week, guys!" look on the sidelines. The dude deserves a freaking Oscar.
- The Dallas Cowboys are getting a real taste of what it's like to have a shitty team and 100,000 seats to fill. Solution: be a destination venue for the opposing team's fans every week. I was at the Monday Night Football debacle where Pittsburgh Steeler fans dominated the stands at FedEx Field. What happened in Dallas was worse, and I NEVER thought that was possible. It's a problem.
- The Philadelphia Eagles mounted a comeback against a Jaguars team that might have scored 20% of their season total in the first half of that game. (I reserve the right to backtrack on this when the iced teas are less...Long Islandy.)