clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Wait...We Have a Game This Week! Rex Grossman Looks For Winning Record

New, comments

I just checked the calendar and it is actually still the regular season!

The Redskins still have games left to play! I am as guilty as the next guy when it comes to spending December looking at offseason issues, but by the time December has come, we have spent the last ELEVEN MONTHS getting geared up for something...anything. As it turns out, we are mostly getting geared up for the next eleven month cycle of hope. We could be in a worse spot.

(Don't ask how it could be worse by the way. The answer would thoroughly depress you.)

The Jets are coming to town this week and THE MOST EXCITING PLAYER IN THE NFL (a.k.a. Rex Grossman) will be looking to stake himself to a winning record as the starter. It says here he gets it!

Listen, the Jets have legitimate playmakers on both offense and defense. But there is something about a Rex Grossman vs Mark Sanchez matchup that has me thoroughly moderately intrigued. Mark Sanchez is nowhere near as exciting as Rexy. When he makes mistakes, they are less likely to be the fireworks-inducing kind that our boy makes. Instead, he is capable of making a string of boring mistakes that put the Jets in peril of losing.

Sanchez is also capable of making a play at the end of the game to TOTALLY REDEEM himself, Lloyd Christmas-style, whereas Rex Grossman is more the Harry Dunne type. He might be driving an Astro mini-van, but it is completely decked out to look like a dog. Rex does nothing halfway, and I mean NOTHING. When he turns the channel, he cancels it forever. When he eats a steak, he sends a letter bomb to the cow's family. When he throws an interception, he makes sure it costs us dearly.

Rex Grossman is sitting on a 4-4 record. He is rocking a 60% completion rate and we are all right to quietly think we would be slightly better off had he never been benched. By slightly better off, I don't necessarily mean we would have a better record, or be in playoff contention. I just mean we would have some memory of the losses John Beck led us to. Seriously, did those games even happen? Was that real? I feel like Hansel here. Haven't I been drinking heavily the last month or so, and couldn't that have been all in my head?

And...???

It was...I've never even been to Mt. Vesuvius.

Redskins 24, Jets 17