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With the 6th pick in the 2007 Draft, the Redskins select Manumana

Out of Texas State, from the movie Necessary Roughness. Or that's what Jim Reineking thinks we'd do in his Fictional football player mock draft (with a giant Hat Tip to Football Outsiders).

6. Redskins Manumana, C Texas State... Massive Manumana to help reincarnate the ol' Hogs in D.C.
Frankly I think this pick is ridiculous. I'm perfectly comfortable with Casey Rabach under center and simply cannot understand how we'd burn the #6 spot on Manu. I still support trading down as we lack a 2nd, 3rd, and 4th round Fake Fictional Player draft picks and could really bolster our fake, fictional defense with some additional Day One selections.

But if I had to pick at #6? I'd take Fredrick A. Polowaski out of Adams College. Some call him Ogre, from Revenge of the Nerds. He'd provide that versatile pass-rushing, run-stopping, nerd-bashing Defensive Linemen we sorely missed in 2006. All that said, I really think we could move down in the draft and still have a shot at him. Many NFL Personnel guys give off a distinct "nerd" feel and will likely pass on Ogre given how mean he was to Booger, Skolnick, Lamar Latrell, Wormser and the gang.

Am I being fair to Manumana though? A character immortalized by the great Peter Navy Tuiasosopo who also, incidentally, played E. Honda in Street Fighter the movie? Also, wasn't it totally super cheap in like the third Street Fighter 2 Turbo Alpha Pimp Juice Edition when they made it possible for E. Honda to move while performing the incredible Hundred Hand Slap? I had a real problem with how they handled that move and feel like the entire video game franchise's integrity was damaged by what I interpreted as a clear Sumo Wrestling bias. E. Honda went from the worst character to the best character overnight, and I lost many SNES controllers because of it. Total bullshit.

In any event, it's been a decade since I've seen Necessary Roughness so I don't really remember anything besides Kathy Ireland in that movie, though here are the (alleged) $$$ quotes:

Paul Blake: What's with all the attention?
Manumana: Where I come from, Mr. Blake, we're taught to respect our elders.
Paul Blake: Oh yeah? Well, I'm not that eld, alright?
And who could forget (and I did):
Lucy Draper: I'm an Armadillo just like the others.
Manumana: You're an Armadillo, but not like the others.
Lucy Draper: You're alright Manu.
You sure are Manu, you sure are.

Interesting anectode: when Necessary Roughness came out in 1991, there did not exist a Texas State College/University, thus making it a clever choice for the copyright uninfringing movie crowd. Unfortunately in 2003, Southwest Texas State University (formerly Southwest Texas State College (formerly Southwest Texas State Teachers College (formerly Southwest Texas State Normal College))) decided they would base their entire University on the low point of Scott Bakula's career -- the high water mark being Quantum Leap, of course -- and renamed themselves Texas State University. Lyndon Baines Johnson, although frequently overshadowed in history by fellow alumnus and Professional Wrestler Shawn Michaels, attended Texas State University.