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This week, all Smoot, all the time

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One of the great things about being a fan of Your Washington Redskins is that I really (perhaps self righteously) believe that this team has more interesting characters than any other in the league. And if pressed to identify the single most interesting of this crazy crew we call the best franchise in the NFL, I would not have a clear-cut answer. Do I take Clinton Portis and his costumes? Chris Cooley and his gentlemanly 21 shots on his fiancee's 21st birthday? That Andre Carter consumes people's souls? Antwaan Randle-El vs. Jason Campbell in a speech lesson battle royale? Casey Rabach's popular sack? Our offensive coordinator has a british accent. Joe Gibbs is the unlikely conductor in hilarious contrast to the misfits he somehow apparently leads, in spite of the fact that he's about as wholesome as they come and some of his players, well, maybe are not so wholesome. (I mean that in the best way -- wholesome coaches, good, wholesome players, baaaaaaad, two legs, better.)

Of all these characters, though, Smoot might be the best to quote and obviously has the absolute best background story for blogging material. First, he's happy to be in Washington rather than Minnesota:

Fred Smoot expects to hear some boos from Minnesota Vikings fans on Sunday night...

"The good part is that I won't be able to tell the difference," he said this week, laughing. "Out of the three or four fans I might still have there, maybe they'll put a little 'S' in front of it and get Smoot out of it."

I owe Dan Steinberg for naming this the week of Smoot and also for having additional $$$ quotes from one of the most entertaining players in the NFL:
"I know a lot about [the Vikings]. And I will inform my team -- like only a real traitor would do," he said with a laugh.
Traitor away my friend, traitor away.

If you haven't familiarized yourself with the sordid details of why Smoot returned to Washington the prodigal son we missed and loved, it was for his prodigal use of a prodigious, er, device. I'll leave it to the ever wise, ever entertaining Will Leitch to give you the gruesome details:

It's a sad day when you can't take your rookie teammates out for a little Lake Minnetonka party with a bunch of whores. This goddamned Internet is invading everybody's privacy.
He's right! So maybe Fred got a little too excited with a dildo but who among us hasn't? I'm looking at you, TexSkins.

All I am saying is, quoting the glorious cinematic masterpiece that was Dodgeball, adversity doesn't build character, it reveals it. And what Smoot has in spades is character, perhaps moreso than any other player on a team full of it, and for that we love claiming him as our own. Hail to Smoot, and here's to giving it to those Vikings like they were paid guests on the love boat.

Too much? Let me know.