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Monday Night "Football"

[editor's note, by Skin Patrol] Quotes around Football in no means meant to dismiss what was actually an exciting game in virtue of Buffalo's meltdown. Dallas never quit despite playing very forgettable football through most of the game and deserves credit for that. This was a game worth watching, even if the result didn't please me one bit.
I'm reluctant to dwell too often on the decisions of other team's football games, for fear of appearing obsessed or something, but this was as good an opportunity for us to pull within half a game of the Dallas Cowboys for the NFC East as we will get from the likes of Buffalo. Quickly, two good bloggers covered this game, at Blogging the Boys and Buffalo Rumblings.

Thanks, Buffalo. Might be the worst team in the National Football League. If you win the turnover battle 6 to 1 in virtue of Tony Romo treating your players as teammates, two of those turnovers immediately generating 14 points, and return a kickoff for a touchdown, and lose, then you shouldn't be allowed to play anywhere besides Canada. There aren't going to be any games that are more winnable than this, Bills. I just watched what couldn't have been more gift-wrapped W for Buffalo yet there they were, giving Dallas a chance to win with a two-point conversion. When that failed, thanks to TO, who was a failure the entire game, they managed an onside kick. Two field goals later and the game is over.

Terrell Owens who? I'm pretty sure he was thrown at 11 times, at least 10, and finished with 2 receptions for 25 yards. That's somewhere below a 20% catch rate, which ain't half awful; it's full awful.

Trent Edwards who? It's just this kid's second start, so expectations were low heading into this game, yet you'd never have known given the amount of slobbering Ron was doing late in the game. When in the history of MNF has a guy done less and received more praise? 5.6 yards per pass won't get the job done. Through 4 quarters and 31 passes, you generate a grand total of 3 points offensively. I didn't see him throw the ball more than 10 yards down the field once. His longest pass was 23 yards in virtue of Marshawn Lynch likely getting some YACs. I did see him throw a costly interception when the Bills had an opportunity to put the Cowboys to bed, returned by Newman damn near the entire field. Huge credit to Lee Evans for chasing him down and saving six, though who cares? You guys can't win football games.

Silver lining? None, Cowboys won. Ok, ok, I was giddy to see Tony Romo look so bad, throwing 5 picks on 50 attempts with two more easy interceptions dropped by Buffalo defenders. Buffalo isn't going to coax five interceptions out of any quarterback for the rest of the year and thus won't win a single football game from here on out. I wonder if the Football Gods will punish me for that comment on December 2nd, but I can't help myself; what an absolutely miserable showing by the Buffalo Bills.

I miss commercials. Someone explain this to me, because I'm not a television guru. If I'm watching the game on ESPN, I'm picking up beer and car commercials on play stoppage. (Not that I love watching commercials, but production value suddenly means more to me than it ever has previously having suffered through hours and hours of its privation.) I'm watching it on ESPNHD and I get the benefit of learning about life saving neck-beepers on low budget commercials with the unsolicited views of the former Surgeon General on why my 24 year old heart could use an emergency "I've fallen but it's because I'm drunk can't get up" device. Or some really bald, really old guy -- who clearly missed a thousand opportunities to fufill his life's mission -- telling me why a mini-swim-in-place pool is so much better than a regular sized pool because he doesn't have to navigate those treacherous turns. Besides affording me the opportunity to work on my stroke (yuck yuck), thus reliving my dream of becoming an Olympic swimmer that I gave up in utero, why should I really buy your crappy tiny pool? I'd rather have a hot tub. That shit only looks enjoyable out of a Sky Mall at 10,000 feet when I'm loaded off Jack Daniels minibottles. Give me a break.

Looking towards Green Bay for the rest of the week.