FAT ALBERT = FAIL!

by GeoFly on Sep 14, 2011 1:20 PM EDT

So nice to see that "Ol Fatty" is so productive (NOT!) in his new job.

The "Big Baby" waitress groper got 2 tackles on the day, no other stats and now he's sick (now there's a surprise) and listed as improbable for week 2.

Sounds like some things never change!

"But, I feel like this is going to be the last place I’m going to play"- Albert Haynesworthless

Funny Albert, but I feel like you could be right......

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Unfortunately,

Haynesworth was actually fairly productive. He had a QB hit and 3 pressures. Not bad for an interior d-lineman. I’d imagine that Belichick will take that sort of production out of a what, 2013 6th-round pick?

by CarverM on Sep 14, 2011 2:52 PM EDT reply actions

Completely agree, I hate to say it but he looks like he can be in Beast Mode any week now.

To Everyone: Don’’t even post about him! Who cares! Just pretend he doesn’t exist. We don’t need weekly posts when his stat line isn’t that great. AH played well Monday and it was hard to watch.

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by Parks Smith on Sep 14, 2011 6:33 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs

Not to mention he forced a pair of holding penalties

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by Steve Shoup on Sep 14, 2011 7:02 PM EDT up reply actions

Had to read that twice

I could have sworn that said “he force a pair of holding panties”.

No Danny, Nooooooo - Tom Landry, 1982., and Washington Redskins fans, 1999-

by BillWard on Sep 15, 2011 10:44 AM EDT up reply actions

haha

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by Steve Shoup on Sep 15, 2011 10:55 AM EDT up reply actions

That has to start being a major stat

Drawn Penalties by D-Linemen, very underrated and underreported statistic

Pommylee

by Pommylee on Sep 16, 2011 1:41 AM EDT up reply actions

yep

He’s still getting into shape too. He could be a force in a few weeks if he stays healthy.

"It's a dog eat dog world, and I'm wearing Milkbone underwear." - Norm Peterson

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by Kevin Ewoldt on Sep 15, 2011 9:19 AM EDT up reply actions

In Shape?... Sphere?... Globe?

by 1x1an on Sep 15, 2011 11:20 PM EDT up reply actions

At this stage, Albert is just another team's player

He’s likely to be a factor when we play the Patriots.

by Donnio1234 on Sep 14, 2011 6:59 PM EDT reply actions

Sadly, he should be ready to go by week 6 or 7

by Obey on Sep 15, 2011 1:32 PM EDT reply actions

i would guess within a week or two

he was pretty good monday night in 30 snaps, and my guess is he will be getting the starting snap count soon enough in the 50 range.

If he isn’t injured when we face the Patriots, I worry for Grossman’s life.

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by Steve Shoup on Sep 15, 2011 1:37 PM EDT up reply actions

He'll be indicted by then... he'll grope a waitress in Boston, punch a cop and get a stripper pregnant... all in the same day!

by 1x1an on Sep 15, 2011 11:24 PM EDT up reply actions

and the media calls him lazy

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by Steve Shoup on Sep 16, 2011 12:58 AM EDT up reply actions

Ol Fatty's stat line today

ZERO. Of course he didn’t play, but that’s about what we got out of him.
I fart in his general direction.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

by GeoFly on Sep 18, 2011 7:49 PM EDT up reply actions

+1 for Holy Grail reference.

"Please don't dominate the rap, Jack, if you got nothin' new to say."-Robert Hunter

by MagicHat on Sep 21, 2011 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions

what?? He played 23 snaps

just b/c he didn’t register a sack or tackle doesn’t mean he had a bad game. Against the Cards Bowen, Carriker, and Cofield combined for ZERO sacks, tackles, pressures, hits and assists.

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by Steve Shoup on Sep 21, 2011 1:58 PM EDT up reply actions