The Redskins Owe the Patriots For the Last Game But...Uhhhh...We're a Little Short Right Now...Can You Come Back in Four Years?

Thanks to the NFL scheduling gods, we--the Washington Redskins--get to play every team in the AFC once every four years...UNLESS we meet up in the Super Bowl with one of those teams the same year we play them in the regular season. That is of course impossible this year because we did not play the Denver Broncos in the regular season. (No way I am betting against the Broncos from here on out. Did you know if you say anything bad about Tebow, millions of people who are otherwise the nicest, most polite, God-fearing folks will threaten to letter-bomb you and your family?)

We all remember the last time the Redskins faced off against the Patriots. Who can forget when a team goes for it on 4th down to get a few insurance points in the 4th quarter--because 20+ points is never a safe lead in the 4th quarter against the kinds of offenses we put on the field? They answered the question: "We are averaging 8 yards per play and it is 4th and 3...do we care that we look like total assholes?"

First of all, I love that kind of play from both the quarterback and the coach. It just really sucked to be on the side we were on that day.

WELL NOW IT'S PAYBACK TIME!!

Uhhhh...do you think Belichick and Brady offer a layaway plan for that? I am thinking we can put a few good plays as a down payment this week, and then in four years, we can try and make the rest of the payments. By then, Brady will have added Jessica Biel and Scarlett Johannson as sister wives to Gisele. There is no way he could still be THAT focused on football at that point, right?

Just so I don't let you all down, let's be clear about one thing: we have no business even being in this game this week...which is EXACTLY why we will be in this game in the second half! I fully expect the Redskins to have the ball this week with a chance to put the game in reach or to even take the lead late in the third quarter or early in the fourth. At that point, it will be up to us...to beat ourselves.

We'd like to think that there is a God that would empower a team like ours to rise up against the same bullies who wedgied us the last time we played them.

We'd like to think that there is a God that would tip the scales in favor of the underdog on a week like this.

Unfortunately for us, that God is busy opening holes in defenses for Tim Tebow and that scale is being used by Trent Williams and Fred Davis to measure bags of weed.

P.S. This game has OVERTIME written all over it. You heard it here first.

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