Debunking Tired Redskins Cliches

Okay. We're fans, right? We're passionate, often irrational, and sometimes downright manic. It gets kind of annoying to hear the same arguments over and over, right? So I'm here to tell you why you should shut the hell up about them. Well, it's mostly because they're annoying, but other than that... I'll let you read. Without further ado...

1) Rex Grossman sucks. John Beck sucks. Everyone sucks.

To some degree, this is absolutely true. Rex Grossman isn't very good... but c'mon, do we really have to rehash it every single day? And now that John Beck's our QB1, can we at least pile shit on him now? That is, if it's really necessary to pile shit on a guy when he'll never read this, never care what we have to say, and probably won't take any of our suggestions if Coach Shanahan doesn't tell him to do so. As much as we may not want to admit it, we don't matter. We can scream and yell all we want, but wouldn't it be better to, I don't know, talk about something other than our unfortunate QB situation?

As to the third sentence, yeah, our team doesn't look very good right now. Our defense shit the bed like a baby. Our offense... well, we didn't have two of our OL starters and they shit the bed too. I guess that was expected, and we should probably be more disappointed in the defense that's OHMYGOD IS IT A FLUKE? I THINK IT'S A FLUKE OHMYGOD. Whatever. The Panthers are an offensive beast. Sure, we played like crap. Sure, the defense probably should have put more pressure on Cam Newton. Sure, Deangelo Hall probably should have been covering Steve Smith (I mean honestly, what was that about? Their "feud"?) But in the end, we're a .500 team. We may not look at all like a .500 team, but we are, which is a lot better than most of us predicted this year (with the possible exception of IH8Dallas).

2) Shanny should be fired. His fucking son should be a puppet. I hate Jim Haslett. GAHHHHHHHHHH.

Again, there is some truth in those three statements (four?) But really, Shanahan fired? Okay, I'm not sure that anyone outside of Donnio believes that, but to even bring up the notion is absurd. And it would be a regression by Snyder, showing the league that we're still the laughing stock because our owner is an asshole. Do you really want that? Again, I don't think there are a lot of Snyder apologists left, but the fact remains that a call for Shanahan's head is IDIOTIC at this point.

As for Kyle... well, he's attractive? In all seriousness, maybe he should be a puppet. He doesn't really know how to run a defense without a guy like Andre Johnson. We've got some very talented RB's, and frankly, Daddy Shanny should probably go back to the successful, run-centric offense that made him win without John Elway under center. Kyle's playcalling does not fit our personnel. Perhaps when we get our franchise QB (that's next, people), Kyle's offense will succeed. Until then, either he needs to wake up and change up his gameplan, or hand the reins over to his Dad.

As for Haslett... last year was not reflective of his talents as a defensive coordinator. He was forced to run a 3-4 defense with the entirely wrong personnel, and that's why our defense sucked. This year, the defense has won games for us. Our offense was anemic with Sexy Rexy at QB, and because Kyle abandoned the run after like... two drives, we couldn't score for shit. So yeah, the defense did play badly last game, but I'm not so sure that means Haslett sucks. The defense has seriously improved this year. I don't think one bad game makes or breaks it. Of course, if the defense continues to regress, then we have a problem. But that's not the case yet.


First off, in hindsight it would have been nice to have Cam Newton. C'mon guys, that wasn't in the realm of possibility. And reaching for a QB like Gabbert (who's the definition of utter suckitude) would have been unwise. Now, we've got a potential ROY candidate in Ryan Kerrigan, and we should be happy. Next year, sure, QB should be high on our list, as well as OL. That's pretty obvious, though. Do we really have to argue tirelessly about it? We know, we know. And there really isn't a lot of dissension on the topic.

We all know we need a QB. Which one? I can't say. Again, you have to think about what we want vs. what's actually possible. You want Andrew Luck? Keep dreaming people. No way the Colts or the Dolphins pass up the opportunity for the next Peyton Manning. Honestly, just throw that out the window with other insane hypotheticals.

We all know we need depth along the OL, need a RT (that's been beaten into us so wonderfully by Steveo26), need a guard. Mostly we need more OL. We kept way too many receivers this year, and now that we've got Silverback and Kory GermanNameICan'tReallySpell out for extended periods of time, that was an unwise move.

Don't draft my mom. She's blind as a bat. She might even throw more interceptions than Rex. Might.

4) We're hopeless. You're a homer. Shut up, you're a homer! No I'm not, I'm just a realist. You're too negative. SHUT UP.

Fact is, I don't think any of us are truly realists, including myself. We can't be realists because our love for the Redskins gets in the way. We can't predict the future (unless you're an ancient alien like washingtonwin). We can't control what the Redskins can do anymore than an elderly person can control their bowels. Really, we're all homers, some to a greater extent than others. Our team isn't as bad shape as we sometimes argue. I root for the Orioles, and let me tell you, that's a much sadder existence than rooting for the Redskins.

In closing, chill your tits. There's nothing we accomplish by arguing incessantly. Can't we find something else to argue about? Or at least, bring some new arguments into the equation. Just don't keep fighting about the same things because we don't really come to any new conclusions.

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