FanPost

I Need Some Help; Please Read

So now that I pulled the "Please Read" card in the title of my Fan Post, and sucked you in, you gotta read on.


Things have been kind of hectic around here lately hey?  The Mcnabb saga, trade rumors, the draft in less than a week; wow, we need a break. 

 

So I want to get everyones minds off of Football for a minute, and maybe give you all a laugh or two at my expense(don't worry, I'm cool with it)while i'm at it.  Plus, I really need some help and advise on this one.

Let me preface this by saying I am a true man.  I hunt animals from trees, lift heavy weights, have broken bones and let them heal on their own, enjoy picking my nose in the car, wear camo in public, enjoy taking shits, play, coach and watch sports anytime I can, change my own oil, burp on command, eat wings and drink beer, have gone for days without showering(and enjoyed it), enjoy watching people fall, and don't wear anything that says Slim Fit, Low Rise, or European Cut.

 

I do however use a lufa in the shower, shave with a womens razor, collect shoes of all sorts(i'm obsessed with sneakers), spray my car with Victoria's Secret Body Splash, and drink my cofee from a really large mug. 

 

I have a scale that I use to generate man points, to tell just how much of a man someone is.  Certain things you do get you certain points, and other things you do can loose you points.  I certainly loose points by using a lufa, using a womens razor etc.etc.  But I have enough man points accumulated to be able to do these things.

 

Now, here is my problem.  I enjoy dressing well.  I already mentioned shoes, but I like to be up on the latest fashion.  I wear plaid shorts and Kangol hats golfing, have matching golf cleats, tie my ties with really big knots, and usually sport a great watch with a shirt that has cuff-links.  I am married(to a women), so no gay jokes please.

 

I have, since spring started, wanted a pair of Capri Pants.  Not the ones you see the europeans wearing that end just below the knee, and are super tight, I want baggy, cargo style capris that come to the middle of you calf.  The kind you can wear out with a pair of Reef Sandals at a trendy outside bar in the heart of a a metropolitain city, in the middle of the summer, with a nice military button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up.  Is there anything wrong with that?

 

Well my wife seems to think so.  I was unable to find any mens capri pants(prob for good reason) in the store, so I went out and bought a pair of cargo pants, and took them to my aunts house to have her transform them into a cool pair of Capris.  My wife says she will not be seen in public with me if I wear them.  Is this fair?

 

I want to be a trend setter, and can seroiusly invision people outside the gay community, following my example, and sporting capris as the new heterosexual fashion trend.

 

So what are your thoughts?  I am definitly secure in my sexuality, and think I can pull off this look?  I know I'll take a beating for this, but someday, when you see a guy at a bar, surrounded by hot chicks, wearing Capri pants, you can think back and say, Tiller said this would be cool.

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