Hogs Haven Working on the Best Redskins Tailgate Ride of All Time
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 2:45 PM EST
51 comments
Ken and I have been talking about this for too long not to pull the trigger. We've tailgated together for a few years now, and it's time to upgrade our whip (no offense to the Cavalier...she's been a horse the last 2 years). I can't really knock Ken's ride since the only wheels I own are my roller blades (for hockey, take it easy). Anyway, we came up with the dream tailgate machine, and it may come to fruition this year.
The idea: A boxed-style ambulance painted burgundy and gold.
Amenities:
- Gut the inside and add in a L-shape couch, kegerator, stripper pole, and a flat screen TV, which will be mounted on a swivel so when we're parked at Fedex - it is visible from anyone standing outside.
- Wet bar
- External tap so the kegerator tap can be accessible from the outside of the truck
- Burgundy & gold lights, sound system that covers all 5 Fedex lots, and I guess a gimicky horn that plays HTTR (we can keep the ladies entertained with that button)
So, the obvious question is, "How are you going to pay for this?"
Well, I have a few ideas. First of all, ambulances range from $1,000-$3,000 on ebay. I'm specifically looking at this one. Most of these ambulances are in the Midwest, so if I time it right, then I pick it up on the way to Russ Grimm's Hall of Fame induction ceremony in August. For sure I will need friends to follow me home and a mechanic sitting shotgun. That would give me a month to get it ready for week 1.
This truck will easily have a lot of exposure (not just because of Hogs Haven, but just in general on the Beltway and in the streets of DC). This makes it a great opportunity for marketing.
- Make a deal with a shop like Maaco to paint the truck and in return throw an ad on the side.
- Do the same with a furniture company
Perhaps I can get a full custom shop to do the whole thing. This is something that for sure could garter some attention for a webisode. Driving this thing around Canton along with all the break-downs, parties, and legions of Skins & Cowboys fans could lead to some great comedy. Comcast, I'm looking at you.
It would be the ultimate road game machine, too. I know it wouldn't make it out of Philly alive, which gave me the idea to upgrade to a Bank Truck, but unfortunately those aren't for sale anywhere used.
We miss anything?
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This
is made of awesome!
SpottieOttieDopaliscious
Hilarious.
My friends and I were thinking about all throwing down on a tailgating machine but we never even thought of an ambulance.
Brilliant.
How can we work Beirut into this?
"By far the worst performers on the team are in the front office." – Sally Jenkins
Oh, we'll have a special slot in the ambulance to hold the bingbong table
http://www.bingbongtables.com/
I’m still using the 1st model they put out 5 years ago…i should ping them on upgrading me to a custom one…like those Toyota drivers that did free commercials for driving 300K or whatever. This table has been through hell….incl Canton last year, 3 Fedex full seasons in heat, rain and snow. Little warped, but still serviceable.
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 4:30 PM EST up reply actions
does the fact that I
thought of two right off the top of my head make me a bad person?
SpottieOttieDopaliscious
That's off my record, you can't prove anything
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 4:30 PM EST up reply actions
Yeah - what he said.
"By far the worst performers on the team are in the front office." – Sally Jenkins
We definitely need help...
Getting it back to DC is one thing….finding someone who is a decent mechanic to help get this thing back to DC/driveable is another. Unfortunately, none of my friends or even friends-friends know shit about cars.
Maybe I should take a night class this summer.
Either way, it will be the HH tailgate epicenter for all HH community that comes to fedex.
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 4:27 PM EST up reply actions
I'm assuming you guys won't know what the problem is until you get it?
Or do you know of any problems now?
SpottieOttieDopaliscious
if an Ambulance costs $1k and hasn't been started for a year...
yea, it’s gonna be a mess. For sure we wont know the problems. Seller said to bring a new battery…nice.
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 4:31 PM EST up reply actions
Yeah my friends bought a school bus last year and totally pimped it out but had alot of trouble with the engine
Plus finding a place to store it can be a hassle.
by BayAreaBullet on Mar 12, 2010 5:08 PM EST up reply actions
I can handle the storage aspect
St Megan is really going to have to step up on this one! Nothing like buying a new house and parking an ambulance in the backyard.
they don't make 'em like St. Megan anymore
my wife would’ve laughed her head off while saying hell no.
SpottieOttieDopaliscious
Well, with the ambulance..
I’m sure Ken will have to agree to at LEAST 2 more kids. I really cant wait to see this play out.
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 6:03 PM EST up reply actions
My brother is a certified Ford Mechanic
and I think you might consider some type of pull-down camo for the Phily trip. You know, install something like the big dump trucks have to cover their load—a rolling fabric that you can snap down on the sides when leaving. You could even investigate getting different NFL teams to sponsor/buy separate coverlettes, maybe for every away game each year.
Well……that’s going a bit hypocritical/lame, (but, it Would ensure your safe outage from the respective parks.
I think you’re going to need an alarm system……….
oh man it would get fucked up in Philly.
Philly fans would break into the ambulance looking for Nitrous Tanks then set it on fire when they couldn’t find any.
by BayAreaBullet on Mar 15, 2010 3:36 PM EDT up reply actions
0% chance this thing goes to Philly
Philly fans once tar and feathered an opponent’s fan’s car. Yea…I don’t need that.
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 15, 2010 6:25 PM EDT up reply actions
Reminds me of this ride I saw
I saw this amazing ride back in fall ‘08 when I lived in Raleigh, NC. It was parked outside Hi5, a sports bar that also hosts the local Redskins fan club on Sundays. They have their own private room and everything. If you’re ever in Raleigh on a gameday, I highly recommend watching the skins from there.
http://picasaweb.google.com/108054866361090928092/Random#5447855198083753362
I've seen and met these guys once before
great ppl
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 4:25 PM EST up reply actions
Fuck yes
If only we could get one that looked like the one from ghostbusters that’d be the shit.. I’m drunk agAin… Much love from key west!
I'm worried about the beer supply. After this case, and the other case, there's only one case left- Barney Gumble
by CptChaosSidekick on Mar 12, 2010 4:18 PM EST via mobile reply actions
Spring break bro
Crazy as hell down here. Ran into some skins fans but really I’ve been drunk the whole time since Monday. Bar crawl at 10 am tomorrow!
I'm worried about the beer supply. After this case, and the other case, there's only one case left- Barney Gumble
by CptChaosSidekick on Mar 12, 2010 6:31 PM EST via mobile up reply actions
Oh man...
http://blogs.tampabay.com/80s/2009/07/ghostbusters-car-for-sale-on-ebay.html
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 5:23 PM EST up reply actions
in case anyone is wondering, the model is: 1959 Cadillac Miller-Meteor
(which is a hurse…same name/model for current cadillac funerals)
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 5:26 PM EST up reply actions
We have been kicking this around for a couple years now...
I think it is safe to say the time has come. Hogs Haven deserves to be represented by a ghetto tailgating ambulance.
That misses opening kick-off b/c it broke down in the middle lane of the Beltway
We can call it: Haynesworth I
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 12, 2010 5:26 PM EST up reply actions
Filed to ESPN: There’s a new running back in Washington. Redskins reached agreement with RB Larry Johnson on a three-year deal.
and has 2 flat tires
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 13, 2010 12:12 AM EST up reply actions
For starters
I’m not an expert on cars but I take automechanics at my high school. Im on my third year and can do all of the basics by myself but still not perfect with major things. I know if it’s been sitting for a year your gonna need a major tuneup.
Should probably change oil, the calipers and wheel cylinders are probably seized(all depends on climate really), should check tires for dry rot, if they have cracks on the sidewall and head they are dry rotted.
Do you know if it’s been sitting on ground or in a garage for a year?
i dont know what u said but ur hired
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 14, 2010 3:32 AM EST up reply actions
Well
See there’s a few reasons I can’t be your ride along mechanic.( although I think it’d be an awesome experience)
I’m only 17 so I kind of need my mom’s permission to leave state. I doubt she would let me travel around the country in an ambulance. Plus I’m having trouble finding a job and still have to pay my parents back insurance money for my truck. Sorry I can give advice to get it in good running condition but can’t go for a ride.
So your mom won't let you road trip in a broken down Ambulance with 2 dudes you met off the internet?
That’s crazy. Did you show her a picture of Sugar with his mustache?
by BayAreaBullet on Mar 15, 2010 3:38 PM EDT up reply actions
Idk if he would agree
but my dad is much better with cars than me. If your seriously interested in this and get to buying and fixing up let me know. If I can get some more details about trip dates, length expenses I might be able to convince him. I think it would be a pretty good trip if me and my dad could could ride along and fix up the best Redskins tailgating machine ever. Would be pretty cool when people talk about it and we can say hey we were part of that. If you are serious about this give me an email at finney666@msn.com
thanks man, I'll certainly keep u posted.
I probably wont know for a few months when HoF weekend approaches this summer.
"I am excited about starting 2009. We are looking forward to an outstanding year. We're on our way. We have a lot of healthy players this year." - Vinny Cerrato
by Kevin Ewoldt on Mar 15, 2010 10:00 AM EDT up reply actions
Perhaps
You could get it on the show “pimp my ride”. Now that would be the ultimate advertising, and that sucker would be the most pimped out ambulance you’ve ever seen.
Alright
No problem. I would love to have the opportunity to work on it. I’m working on getting a job but the manager at the place im trying kind of screwed me. SHe told me to bring my working papers in on monday that she’d be gone for two weeks but the other managers would take care of it. But then when I took it in the other managers didn’t know anything at all about it so I have to wait two weeks to find out if I get hired. So come summer hopefully money won’t be a problem.
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