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Around SBN: The End Of Sabanball: Details, Barbarians, And Precision

Coach Zorn punting the punter?

[Note by Skin Patrol, 10/13/08 9:28 PM EDT ] Ugh I posted this and then read ReggieBullets' FanPost, which covers the same topic much, much better. He's got a full list of the free agent punters available. Good on Reggie for catching the story first.

So Durant Brooks gets injured and now we're bringing in some other punters in to practice with the team. Related? No says Coach Zorn, via TORB:

Coach Zorn started his press conference with an update and something of a clarification on the punting situation. "We’re bringing some punters in tomorrow," Zorn confirmed. "This has nothing to do with [Durant Brooks's] injury."

In other words, Durant Brooks is slowly punting himself out of a job. He'll have a chance to keep his spot but now will be required to do so in the ever-intimidating circumstance of heated PUNTING PUNTING PUNTING battle. I am so flipping excited I just did 87 pushups. Nothing gets me fired up like punting battles.

Actually there's no need for the facetiousness. Punting and kicking are extremely important to me, perhaps of more personal interest than any other position. This is because God or whomever has not blessed me with athletic genes, meaning my unborn offspring's only hope at participating in the greatest sport on earth is as a punter or kicker. And I'm pretty sure that I could make that happen, too, because the key to punting and kicking is nothing more than repetition. And as I raise my infant male (or female...? Is it even legal for the NFL to discriminate in employment between men and women?) if I simply trick them into thinking that kickers and punters are cool -- taking candy from a baby, am I right? -- then that dumb kid will want to go out there and kick kick kick or punt punt punt and by the time they hit pop warner I'll have a little Sammy Baugh or Matt Moseley on my hands, holla! Paycheck, Skin Patrol, your kid just got a sweet league minimum deal with a 75K signing bonus he wants to give you for the earnest money on your new home. On the next, MTV's Cribs...

How bad has Durant Brooks been? Uhh, pretty bad. Of the 34 recognized statistical punters this year, Brooks is 33rd in average punt at 39.6. Derrick Frost is 26th, consistently mediocre as ever, but still better than the guy who replaced him. In Net Average Brooks is 32nd, etc. He just has not been very good as Your Washington Redskins punter, which is disappointing since we sunk valuable draft resources in him.

Give hope hope, I like to say, or give up on giving up, or some such nonsense. The reality is that Brooks is extremely close to being the kind of guy he will soon be battling for position with, namely, a member of the select group of out-of-work punters who travel across the nation not-unlike circus folk trying to convince some cruel circus task-master that they have a unique, odd, and marketable talent. Tough biz.

Durant Brooks knows that better than most.

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